I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
