She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I party with great urgency now.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
