i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize
