so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
