Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize
