i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
it glows. i had to have it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Randomize
