I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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