Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize