Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
