Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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