My first STD was from a foam party
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
