Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize