fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
