well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
