Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
