Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
