i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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