I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
