that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
