I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
