im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
