Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Randomize
