after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Randomize
