i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
