Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
