i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize