He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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