Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
