i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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