just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
