Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
