I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
