All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
