Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I pour the whiskey from now on
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
