doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize