I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize