Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Randomize
