I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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