my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
