i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
