I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
