Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
