last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
