Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
