I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
