Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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