We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize
