I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
