So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
