A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
