Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
